The Counsel of Will
1st Granite 267, Early Spring
“Soldier, I want you to find Bad Munki.”
A sly smile crept over the dwarves face, making him appear disturbingly elven. “Would you like me to take care of him, sir?”
“Elves-take-you!” I bellowed, “Bad Munki is a former overseer, and should be treated with the respect and dignity deserving of his position!”
“But-”
“Bring him to me, and if he has any complaint about your manners, you’ll answer to me!” The color drained from the dwarf’s face as he turned and ran, helped along by a smack of the flat of my blade. My plans to tour the facilities could wait; this situation was out of control and demanded my immediate attention. “The rest of you,” I jabbed a finger at the squad, their steins shaking and spilling beer down their beards, “Have all former overseers, nobles, and military captains meet me in the Great Hall.”
*****
I smiled at the faces gathered at the table around me: the mayor Locomotive Breath, captain of the guard Boing, militia commander Commatoes (whose bed had to be carried in), chief medical dwarf Kaboom Dragoon, broker Markus_cz, bookkeeper Cythereal, captains Repelex and Teledahn, and the former overseers Leperflesh and Vox Nihili. They stared at my soldiers stationed at attention around the room. Probably admiring their discipline.
“My dwarf brothers and sisters-”
“Where’s Bad Munki?” Vox Nihili demanded dryly.
“I’m sorry, he couldn’t be located at the moment.” The crowd took this moment to admire the fine workmanship of the axe I was leaning on. “You know how he is, disappearing whenever he’s needed. Or not. But as I was saying, it has come to my attention that our culture is in a crisis. That is why I gathered you here. And they are out there.” I waved my hands at the galleries, where curious dwarven peasants were gathering, abandoning their duties. “They are the arm of Gemclod. And a strong arm requires a strong will. We are that will, and we have been found wanting. I intend to correct this. First, how can we rule effectively if the common dwarf does not respect us? Our leadership, however wise and just, is lost if ignored. Thus, we need the trappings befitting our station. So I ask, what is it you need to carry out your duties?”
I was met by silence. Maybe I just needed to get the ball rolling. “Cythereal, you keep books. Do you need any more?”
“No, no I’m fine” she squeaked out.
“Boing?”
Her cold eyes locked onto me. “I heard rumors I was supposed to get a new room.”
“Oh, yes, of course! We should reward our former overseers for their efforts.”
“Well, I also want a bigger office and dining room. And a new chest. A nice one.”
I nodded to the rest of the overseers. “I’ll look at your accommodations as well.” I then noticed the mayor biting on his lip in a very unbecoming way. “Is there something the matter, Locomotive Breath?”
“How am I supposed to work? I have no living space, no offices, nothing to call my own!”
“Which is exactly why I called you here, I’ll place orders immediately.”
“Now that I’ve surely convinced you that I know this problem exists and am doing everything I can to address it, I want to examine the current lawlessness. While dwarves are naturally the most productive race, they need boundaries to focus their energies.” Cythereal fidgeted at this. Probably the natural excitement on seeing society steered the proper way. “Of course, I keep my troops well disciplined. But I ask you, how should we direct the common dwarf? Mayor! You interact with them regularly, what do we need to realize Gemclod’s full potential?”
“Erm… uh… buckets?”
“Buckets?”
“Well, never can have too many buckets.”
“Indeed. Boing, make sure not a single bucket leaves these walls.”
“Hrm, buckets!” Vox Nihili scoffed. “If you really want to save this hole, it won’t be through buckets.” The former overseer then went through a list of demands.
“See! This is the leadership we lose by just forgetting our former overseers. I created this council so they can share their brilliant ideas like this. I also intend on harnessing your natural leadership abilities on the field. I will promote each one of you captains of your very own squad!”
Boing turned slowly to Vox Nihili. “I should have killed you when I had the chance.” Some joke between friends? I didn’t get it, but Kaboom Dragoon had once said I was lacking in humors.
“Just one last item I wish to address today, my colleagues. Unfortunately, we have not codified how new overseers are chosen. Overseers choosing their successors sounds good in theory, but in practice I think we all can see how it turned out. Going through the records, I discovered that Boing hadn’t even appointed anyone at all! Bad Munki only appointed me because of a chance encounter. Could you imagine what would have happened if he had tripped over a cat? Then a cat would be overseer! Is there a more ridiculous notion? It is merely by luck that we have avoided disaster thus far. Therefore, I propose we place the power to grant overseership in this council, the Counsel of Will.”
Metagame talk: This council includes everyone I mentioned at the beginning plus Bad Munki (ie all nobles, captains, and overseers). It is merely advisory, there is no voting going on. If council members want to make a banner or place advice or whatever, I will consider, but not necessarily act on it. This is largely a tool to allow someone who is supposed to be unassertive (the dwarf Minty) to enact sweeping social change (by at least making it appear he is backed by the various leaders). I am not suggesting this be a permanent thing; the next overseer could abolish it, and it might not even last my reign.
YeOldeButchere wrote :-
Journal of Yeol Deabo Tcher, Armorer and Weaponsmith of Gemclod
Is it too much to ask for Gemclod to have an overseer who isn't massively incompetent in some way? I'm not asking for someone perfect, just someone who isn't a gigantic moron in some way. The last overseer wasted the resources of the fortress on trinkets, and, thankfully, Minty is putting an end to this and focusing on what really matters: weapons and warriors. But he's also decided to form a council of something or another to rule the fortress. A council!
Don't get me wrong diary, I don't care that this council is breaking from "tradition", "tradition" can die as far as I'm concerned. But that's just the thing, it's a council of "nobles", former overseers and other relics of the past who have no right to rule! The first fucking decree was to build themselves new rooms and attend to their petty wants. Because that's exactly what Gemclod needs, a bunch of lazy, worthless aristocrats! This is the worst thing to happen to this place, and that's saying a lot.
But.
Despite all this, there are some interesting opportunities. Poor decisions aside, Minty is creating a powerful army. More powerful than any raised by dwarves in nearly three quarters of a century, if given proper training, weapons and armor. I provide two of these things. Minty might be their leader, but they trust me as well. They have to, or otherwise how could they trust the weapons and armor that keep them alive?
Minty will make a mistake sooner or later. The average intelligence and inevitable bickering of the cretins on his "council" guarantees that. And when he does, I'll make sure his subordinates place their full trust in me instead. Then to hell with him, or his council, or anyone dumb enough to be in my way.
I can wait as long as I have to, but for the sake of our people, I will be the next overseer of Gemclod.