Many Happy Returns
1st Felsite 267, Late Spring
It was the first meeting in the new council room.
The nobles were clumped around the room, chatting in their various groups. Squatting in the shadows of a corner was a figure I hadn’t seen in months.
“So, our foreseer has finally decided to join us, eh?” I extended my open hand to him with a smile. He regarded my palm as if it were writhing mass of purring maggots, and agonizingly slowly his gaze followed my arm past my shoulder and to my face. By Etur, he didn’t so much as stare at me as through me. My body shuddered with revulsion, which I tried to hide by exaggerating my turn and stride to the head of the table.
“Friends, gather round.” My arm swept the room. “I apologize for the lack of seating for everyone. This will be corrected by our next meeting, I assure you. I also apologize for the dampness of the room. A peasant’s beard can only soak up so much water. Perhaps you could help them out and sop up the remaining puddles?” The only sound that met me was the whistling of my breath between my grinning teeth. “That… that was a joke. Oh, never mind. First, I have fulfilled everyone’s personal needs, have I not?”
“Everyone except mine,” spat Locomotive Breath.
“Everyone except yours. I’m sorry for the delay, our esteemed mayor, but an inspection discovered a mushroom growing in your new room. We couldn’t risk you getting sick off the spores, since you are so important to the daily function of our city. Thus, you won’t be able to move in until a thorough sanitization cycle makes the room livable.” Locomotive Breath flopped into his chair, chewing on his lip.
“Second, I propose an expansion of our military caste. Currently, we have only two squads of substantial size, the Gilded Men and the Knives of Domination. Our city swells, yet our defenders’ numbers do not. For an effective force, I suggest we at least triple our number of full-time troops. I also suggest that we give a small amount of compulsory militia duty to every dwarf, so that none may defenseless. I have also already given orders to have every stray dog caught within our halls trained into a weapon of war.”
“An increase in troops also necessitates an increase in supplies. Our industry lacks the infrastructure to effectively equip anything other than our current skeletal fighting force. Thus, I propose we also triple our steel production facilities.”
“Finally, I have a bit of dire news. I fear we have traitor amongst us.” I glared at Locomotive Breath. “I’m sure you know of the incident involving the cave crocodile in the Great Hall. Well, my investigation revealed that the reptile didn’t force his way through our defense, he was let inside.” A strange look passed over Vox Nihili’s face. Could it be… No, I could not suspect one of my mentors. “Now, what I believe happened is that our saboteur snuck a hatchling in. This way it was still small and manageable. He then hid the creature in the well, and raised it until it became the monster we saw. Of course, this could have just been a pet that outgrew it’s owner. However, the concept that a dwarf would be so stupid is so ridiculous that I cannot believe this was anything but intentional. Keep your ears open. I will see fit to reward any information leading to the apprehension of the guilty dwarf.”