5th Slate, 269: HAWAAAARGARGH
HAWAAAARGARGH
I hate this goddamm hospital
I also hate having to run this fort through vomit based morse code
I have deferred to the pudgy little bald fellow running around calling himself the “great architect”
He’s a bit weird
He’s sort of been ignoring what I tell him
He tells me he has expanded the forges
Whatever mate, forge all you like
He was muttering on about gem windows the other day, as well. I told him to just keep shifting all the gems up to my office and not to worry about any windows.
He didn’t look like he was paying any attention though
Perhaps I shouldn’t have let him get a taste of power again
~~~
Great Mondul what the hell is that racket
What the hell is going on
fuck is this racket
“Somebody get me- HAWARAGHRGHGH damn it HAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWAAAARGH – Somebody get me that guy! HEY YOU! YOU THER-HAWWWAAAARGH”
“Um were you talking to me?”
“Yes, get me that funny little GRAAAHAWARGH guy who’s always going on about broken pillars”
“You mean Markus?”
“Is that his name? Yeah him”
“But I’m a-“
“HAWAAARHG”
“I’m a doctor, I’ve got patients”
“Also, while you’re up go and fetch me HAAAAWWAWARARAHGGH sorry was that your face go and fetch me a tuber beer”
god this plague is killing me
wait
I hope that thought doesn’t end up being prophetic
I hate prophetics
“Ah you wanted to see me, Pozzo, old friend”
“Yeah what the shit was that noise, was everything alright?”
“Simply a Cave Dog, sneaking around biting about the entrance. Don’t worry-“
“HAWAARHGHGRHG what”
“I was saying don’t worry, I alerted Minty and his response was more than proportionally necessary”
“You see he called all the soliders to arms, and then ran well waddled, really screaming at the croc and chopped the beast in two before any of them could respond to his call to arms anyway”
“ Thats not BLARGHRHGEHAWARGH actually a cave up there, you do know? It was probably just a real crocodile”
“No, definitely a cave croc. We believe it came up the stairs of certain doom”
“The what?!?”
“Stairs of certain doom. You see, it’s quite funny really, the door was left unlocked.”
WHAAAAAAT
“Why are there stairs of certain doom?”
“Well the reas –“
“BAAHBALHRGHGRGH actually do you know what don’t tell me, just go and lock them would you”
“Ok then!”
this guy is looking waay too chirpy
man I should get some of whatever he is on
“Anything else going on?”
“Well, a bunch of Migrants just arrived before you called me down here”
“Oh. HAWARGH. Go and sort that out then.”
God this hospital is horrible
There seems to be this weird grey film on everything
Seems to be from the vomit
I’ll be better soon
I’m feeling better already
that could be the ale, to be honest
10th Slate, 269
Good to be back on my feet
Really wish I could wash this vomit off
Really wish everybody would wash their vomit off
Actually, that gives me an idea
I’ll go give Markus an assignment
What else is there to do
Seems the water in the well beneath the hospital is getting low
That should get sorted out or all our plague victims won’t have anything to vomit in each others faces
I’ll get Kaboom Dragoon on it, I’m sure I saw a lever for the well somewhere
Those new migrants seem to be settling in well
Haven’t got Nol Fever yet
Hey
wait
“SOMEBODY GET ME THOSE MIGRANTS GODDAMN IT AND WORK FAST”
“Here they all are Ma’am”
“Ok you newbies may have noticed the absurd amounts of vomiting going on around here, it’s not because we can’t hold our liquor, there’s actually a horrible vomiting disease circulating. You get dizzy, chuck your guts out, and then develop something called a Spleen which our doctors have been puzzled about. Anyway, for your own personal safety I’m going to-“
“HAWARRHGAGHARHHGHG”
“Ok never mind. Just all of you go to the hospital and find a vomit pile to fall in”
“Pozzo! Pozzo!”
“What?”
“It’s the stairs of certain doom again!”
“For fucks sake kill the googly-eyed gangly-assed bastard then! And lock the bloody door after you!”
useless fucking amateurs
“Pozzo! Pozzo!”
what the hell is it, leave me alone
“WHAT”
“The hospital is flooding!”
“WHAT”
Pozzo wrote :-
Spring Migrant Wave, 269
I've figured out why we have so many pets, it's because every migration wave brings about 50 with them
Also,
Migrants!
These three are a Family:
Ouroborus wrote :-
Journal of Ourroborus tomearrow:
Wow, what they say about Gemclod is true, you really can smell it from days away. First thing I saw when I arrived was a road lined with the corpses of our enemies, well that explains the smell. The second I see blood and puke all over the place. Out of the fort comes a she-dwarf drunkenly stumbling around the blood, rotten corpses and puke.
"Who re you? Yous want some Armok damn stone rings?"
"No we're here to join Gemclod." said the first dwarf in line, Cerebulon.
"Fuck! Youuur think you're good enoush to to... schtay here? Fuckin' better 'ave more
skills than a dead cat! You there, the fucks your name?"
"Ouroborus, let me say that it is..."
"Goddamnit I did not ashk for your life story, tell me in fiveh wordsh what you fuckin do."
"I... make holes in things?"
"Good enough, now get me a beer, ALL OF YOU!"
That was our overseer, I think she was more drunk than is healthy. Maybe they'll let me make a Ballista, or even a catapult!
Also I am a strand extractor, sweet! Fetch the adamantine! I wonder what sort of life would lead to the skills my dorf has.