Journal of Yeol I, Legendary Armorer and Emperor of All Dwarves
27th Malachite 268
Has it really been a month?
I'm impressed that the entire place hasn't burned to the ground in my absence. Apparently, just about the only thing of note that happened is a high elf snatcher who didn't achieve much. And they've even finished the wall on the roof!
Also some migrants came. I had them all drafted into a marksdwarf squad, The Laborious Worth, except for a competent engineer. Maybe they'll prove brighter than the marksdwarves we already have.
We need them to guard the towers anyway, and the sooner they start to train, the sooner our glorious conquest can begin.
The Crystals of Legend were also sent back to training for their upcoming cave exploration mission. To conquer new lands, we must first conquer the land we have now.
11th Galena 268
Been busy forging armor lately. Not much is happening anyway, so it's not like there's much to write. The only thing bothering me right now is that the parts I've asked to be made for a special project aren't being made, and it's holding back everything else. At least the mechanisms should be done soon.
14th Galena 268
Some dwarves heard screaming coming from the east today.
It didn't seem to be dwarves, so I don't particularly care about it.
15th Galena 268
Kikka, a recruit patrolling the swamp, reported that he found a human corpse in the east swamp today.
Yeah, I can't see anything bad happening when that human diplomat doesn't return. More importantly, though, I'd really like to know what killed him. According to Kikka there was no blood or severed limbs, so it can't be elves or goblins.
Just another mystery in Gemclod.
16th Galena 268
A human caravan! And alive too! Maybe they'll have some thread and cloth. I really hope they do.
It would also be nice if they didn't catch Sudden Unexplained Human Death Syndrome before reaching Gemclod, too. Sure, we can still loot their corpses and pack beasts if they do, but I really want to get rid of the piles of crap we have around here.
I just need to make sure none of the humans, or dwarves for that matter, are dumb enough to touch any of the levers around the trade depot. As far as I know they might cause the fortress to explode.
There's three levers around that thing! Sure, they're marked, but if I recall correctly this was designed by Boing. As far as I fucking know, the one marked "Depot Entry Doors" is a trap and set to drop giant cave spiders on whoever pulls it.
18th Galena 268
Batten down the hatches!
High elves with pikes. A whole load of them at that. Thanks to Dirt5o8 we get some warning, though I honestly wouldn't want to be in his high boots right now.
I guess it's time to sound the alarm and show them the might of the Gemclodian Empire.
But the real question is, how many of those assholes are still hiding?
Tujague wrote :-
My brothers, let us pray
1. O Armok, Armok most holy, Armok god of blood
We offer you the blood of our enemies that you may be appeased and let our FPS to rise
2. We offer you this elf princess' curbstomped domepiece
And this toe what got bit off
And there's this other elf skull looks like a eggshell
Our boy crushed his fucking skull with his bare hands
With his bare hands can you believe that shit
3. Armok, O Armok, we're up shit creek
There's all these fucking demons down there and they're slowing down time
And this forgotten beast is just sitting there waiting to bust in
And we can't scratch our asses without a bunch of elves showing up
And get this our boss man is a crippled guy under a bunch of buckets
Under a bunch of buckets Armok I mean what the hell
4. So maybe you could come up with some grease for Your humble servants
We just need a little love down here for the love of pete
Check out our front door Armok, O Armok, you are into blood and shit
Behold Chunder Road
You want blood? We got blood. We got two hundred yards of blood all the way to the trash cans
Now maybe help us out with some of this bullshit, amen.