As I watched my last hope sprinting away from Treedom's most powerful weapon, I heard someone screaming and gurgling in agony.
When I looked outside, it seemed that because I didn't expressly say not to pick up the flaming chunk of rock, some moron tried to haul it off to the storage bins, got lit on fire, and melted into a pile of gore and bones almost instantly.
I fucking hate this place.
Meanwhile Vucar ran his ass off, Slitheredlow in hot pursuit the whole time.
I have to give Vucar credit, he made it a damn long way.
He just didn't make it far enough.
Slitheredlow took obvious glee in snapping his bones at the joints, my friend's screams of agony only goading it on.
He soon fell to the fate of so many others: paralyzed and decapitated.
A thief apparently stole one of the adamantine axes from the battlefield while Vucar ran. I can't really fault the little bastard if he managed to get in and get out without attracting the attention of demons.
He was apparently SO good he came back for seconds.
I saw a cat following nimby a little while ago. That's another little bastard I can't get rid of.
The mayor just burst into my office wild-eyed. I thought we were being invaded or something, but no.
He just wanted to make sure his precious trifle pewter was safe. Idiot. There hasn't been a caravan here in years.
GOD DAMNIT THREE IS WHERE I DRAW THE LINE.
...wait. What the hell is that noise?
Apparently the caravans DID arrive, and one of them has gone insane and is trying to punch her camel to death. What the hell's gotten into her?
Oh. Of course.
What IS it with this thing and skulls?
I mean, SERIOUSLY! How does that even work!?
Meanwhile that poor camel's barfing everywhere and I'm pretty sure I see a broken leg from here.
Oh thank Armok, now it'll just get a quick death.
How does one camel contain so much barf? I think I'm going to be sick
FINALLY, I think Slitheredlow had to break every bone in the camel's body before she was satisfied. I'm going to post guards at the gatehouse just to be safe.
The next day
God, will these people ever shut up about the burrow? Yes, I KNOW you can't go to the surface to get your shit but I-
WAIT WHAT DID THAT ONE SAY!?
HOW THE FUCK