Intermezzo
Sirocco wrote :-
Meanwhile in a human inn some two score miles hence...
'There's something not right with that boy, I'm telling you. He wears tights.'
'And that silly hat.'
'Not to mention those weird curly shoes- oh shit-'
The three humans huddled round their drinks as the man walked in. His costume was colourful, his hair neatly curled and coiffed, his skin powdered white with some rouge on the cheeks.
'Oooooooh,' he sang. 'A poor minstrel am I, have come to siiiiiing for my suuuuuuuupper!'
'Not, not now Benjamin,' one of the men said as kindly as possible. 'It's been a long day and we-'
'I've written a new song though.'
Groans.
'It's about dwarves.'
More groans.
The bard strummed his lute anxiously and before anyone could protest, a melody issued forth from his lips.
(Click here for lyrics, tablatures and other versions of the song.)
Tears streamed down the young man's face as the last note died away. He burst into tears.
'No!' he wailed. 'Don't pay me, it would only make cheap this beautiful moment!' And with that he ran, sobbing, from the inn.
The drinkers sat in an embarrassed silence for a moment.
'So who wants a pint?'
fatedtemp wrote :-
This has been an awesome LP but it's not over till it's over! So 2, 4 or 5 (Blaze of Glory) or some combination of the above, if there's a Dwarf alive Gemclod is alive.
Also I'm sure Kenning will come along with something better soon but I thought I'd have a go at some lyrics, hopefully the rhythm's not too bad.
Fire and Death (A song for Minty)
Clang! (Clang!) Clang! (Clang!)
The hammers ring out through the halls.
Clang! (Clang!) Clang! (Clang!)
The shields and axes too are forged.
Burn! (Burn!) Burn! (Burn!)
The fires of our forges burn.
Burn! (Burn!) Burn! (Burn!)
Tempering weapons of iron.
Mighty Dwarven forges po~wered
By the fiery blo~od of the earth! (blood of the ea~rth!)
As the smiths ply their trade
Working with the gi~fts of Etur! (gifts of Etu~r!)
Stone goods and metal tools piled high,
Offerings to Deg fi~ll every room! (every ro~om!)
And so the Dwarves cel~ebrate
With the food that the~y all consume! (they all consu~me!)
Roar! (Roar!) Roar! (Roar!)
Nature itself attacks the halls.
Roar! (Roar!) Roar! (Roar!)
So the beasts are put to the sword.
Crack! (Crack!) Crack! (Crack!)
The hospital fills with the hurt.
Crack! (Crack!) Crack! (Crack!)
Doctors make them scream in concert.
The Counsel of Will meets in the hall
To decide the future o~f the fort! (future of the fo~rt!)
Mandate the construction of buckets
And great tombs to house tho~se who fall! (those who fa~ll!)
Carving the rock, smoothing the floors
Masterful engravings o~n the walls! (on the wa~lls!)
Every corner of the Hall of Heroes
Coffins packed toge~ther like pawls! (like pa~wls!)
Thud! (Thud!) Thud! (Thud!)
Boots marching onward through the halls.
Thud! (Thud!) Thud! (Thud!)
Kudust Axematched hears our calls.
Crash! (Crash!) Crash! (Crash!)
Soldiers face to face with our foes.
Crash! (Crash!) Crash! (Crash!)
Screams as they ex~change blows.
The Famous Palisade will stand as
The soldiers of Gemclod mar~ch to war! (march to wa~r!)
They'll tell tales of our bravery and
Our names will be sung for~ever more! (forever mo~re!)
And so the ri~vers will run red
with the blo~od of our enemies! (blood of our enemies!)
Our steel bo~lts will strike down every
Wretched go~blin or elf that flees! (goblin or elf that flees!)
Fire! (Fire!) Fire! (Fire!)
Death! (Death!) Death! (Death!)
Fire! (Fire!) Fire! (Fire!)
Death! (Death!) Death! (Death!)
And so the roa~ds will be lined
With the co~rpses of our enemies! (corpses of our enemies!)
As our pe~ople make their stand here
At the la~st of the Dwarven cities! (Here in Ka~do~la~n!)
While the pi~cks strike ever deeper
Down below The Swa~mp of Malodors! (Swamp of Malodo~rs!)
Through the va~st open caverns
And the shining ada~mantine structures! (adamantine stru~ctures!)
But all's no~t as it seems underground
and in the dar~kness something stirs! (something sti~rs!)
for a ter~rible force awakens
Within the~ bowels of The earth! (bowles of the ea~rth!)
Fire! (Fire!) He~re in Kadolan!
Fire! (Fire!) He~re in Kadolan!
Death! (Death!) He~re in Kadolan!
Death! (Death!) He~re in Kadola~n!
markus_cz wrote :-
Welcome to Gemclod
Hope you like red sand.
Krysmphoenix wrote :-
Alright. I know people are going to ask. So I'll just go ahead and say this.
I'm current getting screenshots of Dwarf Therapist. Everyone is going to have their skills listed, including Labors, Military and Social. Preferences, thoughts, attributes, relationships and pretty much everything you can't find on Dwarf Therapist will not be mentioned; that's going to take a bit more work.
If you are dead or abducted, you will not be on the list; that's just how things work unfortunately.
I also might try to get a number of how many corpses are at Gemclod, elf, human, dwarf or otherwise. I'm not going to do kill-counts though. I'd have to dig through every single military dwarf to do that one.
EDIT: And here they are! Dwarves are listed alphabetically. Bold names means at the time of screen capture, you were on duty in the military.
2M_Gargantua through Dylguy90: Labors, Military, and Social.
FebreezeNinja through Mystery Machine: Labors, Military, and Social.
Mythomanic through Veinless: Labors, Military, and Social.
Viola the Mad through Zyla: Labors, Military, and Social.
EDIT x2: Alright. Now for some fun stuff.
The following dwarves have at least one legendary skill: Anaxite (Miner), Boing (Stone Crafter), Daisyvondoom (Metal Crafter), Frajag (Leatherworker), K0npeito (Miner), Krysmphoenix (Glassmaker), life_source (Stonecrafter), LunarTaffy (Stonecrafter), Mehuyael (Engraver), Minty (Fighter and Axedwarf), Perfect Potato (Miner), Star Guarded (Miner), and Tyshalob (Carpenter). There are 13 Legendary Dwarves in Gemclod at this time.
56 Dwarves are female. 47 are male. 6 are children, 1 is a baby.
Mahoshonen is the saddest dwarf at 0 happiness level.
Toffile is the second saddest dwarf at 60 happiness level.
Krysmphoenix is the happiest dwarf at 1124 happiness level. (I'm pretty sure this is a bug, or the artifact's doing.)
brute_force is the second happiest at 341 happiness level.
Minty has the highest total number of skill levels at 102.
Repelex has the second highest number of skill levels at 70.
Dizz and targus6544 are the most laboring dwarves with 16 assigned labors each.
EDIT x3: More fun stuff!
Number of animals in Gemclod:
Bulls: 3
Cats: 9, 1 owning.
Cows: 4
Dogs: 12, 3 adopted.
Donkeys: 2
Horses: 1
Horse Foal: 1
Kittens: 7, 1 owning.
Mules: 2
Puppies: 16
Ward Dogs: 12, 1 adopted.
Number of Deceased: (Total: 446) Note: For races, I separated out the flashing names, reserved for important people.
Animals and Monsters:
Beak Dogs: 26
Blind Cave Ogres: 2
Bull Calves: 2
Bulls: 3
Cats: 8
Cave Crawlers: 2
Cave Crocodile: 6
Cows: 4
Dogs: 14
Donkeys: 8
Donkey Foals: 2
Elk Birds: 1
Giant Bats: 3
Giant Cave Spiders: 1
Giant Cave Swallows: 1
Giant Olms: 10
Giant Rats: 2
Giant Toads: 3
Gremlins: 1
Grimelings: 6
Harpies: 5
Hoary Marmots: 2
Horses: 15
Horse Foals: 3
Jabberers: 3
Jaguars: 1
Leopards: 1
Mountain Goats: 13
Mule Foals: 2
Mules: 3
One-Humped Camels: 6
Puppies: 29
Reachers: 3
Trolls: 12
Two-Humped Camels: 2
Unicorns: 4
War Dogs: 5
War Elephants: 1
War Giant Leopards: 5
War Grizzly Bears: 9
War Jaguars: 2
War Lions: 10
War Tigers: 12
Megabeasts:
Cyclops: 1
Dwarves:
Merchant: 1
Peasant: 1
Wrestler: 1
Hammer: 2
Spear: 1
Important Dwarves:
Gemclod Dwarves: 34
Elves:
Bowmen: 1
Spear: 9
Sword: 21
Swordmaster: 1
Important Elves:
Administrator: 1
Goblins:
Axe: 7
Hammer: 14
Lasher: 6
Mace: 12
Spear: 9
High Elves:
Axe: 10
Bow: 14
Pike: 2
Spear: 8
Sword: 11
Thief: 4
High Elf Slaves/Recruits:
Human: 6
Important Human: 1
Goblin: 1
Trolls:
Animal Caretaker: 1
Armorer: 1
Cook: 1
Engraver: 1
Furnace Operator: 1
Glassmaker: 1
Hunter: 2
Woodcrafter: 1
Woodcutter: 2
Kobolds:
Thieves: 2
